Attitude of Graditude

For the past year (or so) I have been so overwhelmed with my graduate studies, new condo/construction, transition of the move(s), work, the economy, family affairs, friends (or not so friends), and every day dilemmas.

However, this weekend I did a lot of thinking, soul searching, and it has been very enlightening.

I am learning that I have a lot to be grateful for and I need to focus on these things and not so much on the negative/depressing things going on around me.

I want to change my life for the better. It seems I did "OK" with last year, but it is time to move on and get back on track with my life.

I used to wake up early to exercise. This has depressed me that not only am I not waking up to exercise, but I am dreading getting out of bed. I live in PARADISE! Why do I feel this way? At this time, I have been in cutesy condo since June, 2009, and I still have not taken advantage that my front yard is a playground. I live on the ocean. There are boats, kayaks, runners, bikers, skaters just right outside my front door. Why am I not out there? This is so unlike me.

Well, I have set ALL alarms to go off early. In addition, I have set up the coffee pot. Yes, me, a domestic chore of some sort. I think if the coffee is brewing and then the alarms go off I should get up without hating life too much.

Secondly, I took my daughter, her boyfriend, and my beautiful granddaughter to breakfast. Of course, daughter/boyfriend were high. Granddaughter acts up because of her parents behavior. Everything is chaos...as always. Typical.

A colleague of mine just happened to be driving through town and text to meet me. I replied that I was out with the family having breakfast and he was welcome to come join us. While there, the daughter/boyfriend are drinking and going outside often to smoke, and at one point daughter spills her mimosa and all over the table, my friend and broke the glass.

Regardless....my friend looked at me and said "I wish I was a grand parent." Look how much your granddaughter loves you and you are young enough to do things with her (I had run a half marathon with her before breakfast). He continued to say that his dad was in his 80's when he and his wife had their only son and that his dad never did anything with him. Now, (my friend) is in his early 60's and his son is in his 2nd year in college, on the east coast, and not in a serious relationship.

I was a very young (single) mother, my daughter was a young mother, and I am a extremely young (hot) grandma'ma ;-)

After a weekend of just thinking why why why...my mind just finally said but what about this, this, and this.

I have more to be thankful for than not. My family is not perfect, but I am glad to have them. My job is not the dream job, but at least I have a job. My home may not be complete, but it is in paradise.

So, I have this blog to encourage positive thinking and I realize that I am the one who really needs the encouragement. Guess what I am saying is all of us if we write down the pros and cons in our lives that all will realize what I did this weekend. Our lists will probably show that we have more to be grateful for in our lives than not.

I know there are days and situations that our visions will be clouded with all the day-to-day BS --- but ultimately, if we can get a glimpse of the bigger picture there will be a sun shining upon us all.